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GIVING THANKS! 

GIVING THANKS!

Thanksgiving, 1998
The Outrage Thanksgiving List
It's the holiday season once again, so naturally we're contemplating all our blessings. Here's our list: use the Rageback link at the bottom to tell us what you're most thankful for.


  1. That Sister Outrage decided against the White House internship.
  2. That a serial killer is now targeting trial lawyers.
  3. The feed-a-starving-NBA-player relief effort.
  4. That Gregorian chants hit the best-seller lists.
  5. With Clinton still under the Lewinsky cloud and a divided, clueless Congress, chances of new legislation are dim.
  6. That Jacqueline said "Yes".
  7. That Nichole said "No".
  8. The Mark McGwire/Sammy Sosa home run race.
  9. That America has so much money, and so few problems of its own, that it can afford to send soldiers all over the world to solve problems that have little or nothing to do with the people paying the bill.
  10. That states and cities will no longer have to impose taxes, now that they've found all that revenue from suing cigarette companies, gun makers, brewers, drug companies, Little Bo Peep, the Easter Bunny, etc.
  11. That, thanks to Paula, Hillary found out what it's like to eat her own cooking. And what a tasty dish sexual harassment laws really are.
  12. That, thanks to the glories of technology, people will no longer have to think for themselves.
  13. That God made golden retrievers, Sade Adu, and, as an after thought, Tyra Banks.
  14. That the DOW is making a comeback.
  15. That Jimmy Carter won't.
  16. That market share for network TV continues to fall.
  17. That market share for the Net continues to rise.
  18. That readership of the Outrage continues to grow.
  19. That, at the moment, just about anyone in America who wants a job can get one.
  20. That Dickens novels still sell.
  21. That totalitarianism doesn't.
  22. The guy who shot the person who invented the phrase "convergence of corporate marketing cultures". The jury that let him off.
  23. Smart women who laugh at our jokes.
  24. That no amount of adult folly, stupidity, and incompetence seems capable of corrupting the beauty and innocence of a child's smile.
  25. That Outrage readers, unlike everyone else, are capable of distinguishing sarcasm from sincerity.

Tell Us What You're Thankful For in the Comments Below!

 

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